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Why losing weight has nothing to do with weight.

My body is not “perfect” in the standard sense. It is not ‘ripped’, it is far from a magazine body, or a bikini model or any number of hot bodies I see each day on instagram, in magazines and everywhere in between.

When I am feeling good, my body feels good and looks good - it is strong, it is curvy, it is perfectly formed but, when I feel low, my body wobbles, my c-section belly is a big wibbly pouch, my thighs touch, my arms wobble, my bottom sags and don’t even get my started on my boobs.

It can be hard sometimes to remember you are beautiful, when you are constantly being bombarded with images in the media, Instagram, Facebook and Pinterest, that show only one type of body beautiful women. It’s even harder to believe when you are married to a man with abs of steel! Don’t get me wrong, the man with the abs of steel adores every curve, every line, every wobble of my body but what I realised very early on was that no matter what other people say, it is all about how you FEEL that matters.

I was that kid who listened to a chorus of “surfs up!” when I jumped in the pool (something to do with big waves. . . Sigh), I was the first one in a bra, the one that was chosen last for sports teams and the one who’s thighs rubbed together and got prickly heat every summer (growing up in Asia sucks for an overweight kid). As with many of these things, even when I was older and I hit my ‘goal’ weight, I still felt inadequate, I still felt I needed improvement and I would comfort eat and yo-yo my way back to unhappy.

It took me some time to feel truly better about my body. It took me time to realise that I respected my body enough to want to nourish it with healthy food and healthy thoughts. It took me a long time to realise that I didn’t need to hide any more, that it was safe to step out into my light. ‘Deciding’ to feel that way is never enough, you need to deeply feel it. How many times have you said, ‘this time will be different’ and then go back to old patterns of behaviour? Well, without the big subconscious shifts, quite frankly, getting to where I am now would be impossible.

Feeling beautiful and comfortable in your body is the key to your happiness and success. It took me such a long time to realise it and now I want to shout about it!! Now, the low days of feeling less than body fabulous never stick around for long and when they appear, I know it’s just time to get back to some good old fashioned self love.

My problem when I was heavier was not that I didn’t look beautiful, it was that I didn’t FEEL beautiful and that affected the outward look of my body. That affected the clothes I wore, always choosing baggy clothing to hide my body or jeans that gave me a muffin top because I refused to buy a size bigger. It affected my self care to the point where I lost interest in how my hair looked and how I projected myself to others. It affected my energy so my face always looked lifeless and grey. And well, it goes without saying, my body became sick.

Once I really started to practice self love and self care, the weight just started to fall off. Once I decided to love myself just a little bit more, I began to hit my body goals and if ever I have a mini wobble, I know how to get back to my emotional and spiritual groove and how to keep positive throughout the process.

The thing with weight loss is that it is a by-product of making more loving choices towards yourself. Once I began to love myself and accept myself, the weight started to drop away. For me, a perfect weight is not a size zero, it’s the size you feel sexiest at, it’s the size where you ooze body confidence. Watching a person finally see the true beauty of their body still makes me catch my breath. It is the most beautiful thing you can witness. The secret to losing weight is in loving yourself and allowing the true you to shine brighter than before, the weight loss is simply a side effect.

The Body club course was not created to form a mass army of Barbie dolls, it was created to arm women with the self confidence and self love to become true visions of themselves. And as I said before, the weight-loss is simply a side effect.

Maybe it is time to stand up and join a new wave of women, ready to reach optimum health, whatever size they are. Women who are ready to empower other women and make a change in the world starting with themselves.

To me, you are beautiful my friend. Keep shining.


Please note, whilst EFT and Holistic Nutrition have supported exceptional results in many emotional and physical issues, guidance received is not intended to replace the medical advice of your healthcare provider. If you have any concerns, please consult your doctor.

©2018 by Alexandra Serjeant.